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Judge Ron Jeremy presides over divorce court proceedings in the new Smash Pictures feature "The Divorcee." Some of these women have been wronged, others are just horny or neglected, and one decides to keep her husband after all. Knowing that 100% of marriages will end in either divorce or death, this could serve as either a cautionary tale or an inspirational story, and the purpose it serves really depends on your point of view.
Cynics will see their anti-marriage stance affirmed in the greed that Diamond Foxx displays in negotiating with her estranged husband's lawyer, Mark Wood. Hubby has fled the country and she wants everything he owns. Mark's sure his client won't go for it, but this busty blonde is persuasive and willing to open her legs on top of the desk. Doing what nearly any single or un-monogamous straight guy would do, Mark doesn't miss the chance to suck those titties and slide right in to Diamond's pussy. She looks incredible with her ass rocking back and forth in cowgirl position, wearing nothing but red high heels. It's no wonder Mark can barely contain his excitement – he sounds like he's fighting back orgasm for half the scene, but he holds out like a champ and finally unloads in her mouth. After a fuck like that, he promises to get her the Bentley if she'll do him every week.
All Avy Scott wants is some cock, and she believes the reason her husband won't give it to her is that he's screwing around. He claims he's just working a lot. Judge Ron sees it his way and wants Avy locked up for verbally abusing him when he denies the divorce. She turns on the charm for Bailiff Prince Yahshua, explaining that her outburst was a result of sexual frustration, so if she gets fucked, she'll be able to control her temper – and there's that little matter of not wanting him to put her in jail. He's worried about his job, but she offers to pawn all her jewelry and take off to Mexico with him if he gets in trouble. Only in porn would this argument work, one would hope – and it does work, or maybe it's just that Avy is that hot. She strips and enthusiastically goes down on Prince's nightstick for a couple of minutes before he takes the plunge into her neglected snatch. Their energetic, fun fuck looks best when he's got her in sidesaddle, with the hypnotic jiggle-bouncing motion of her great tits lulling you sweetly into your orgasm. After Avy licks his cum off her face, they take off for Mexico.
Romantics will find hope in the harmonious resolution to an acrimonious separation between the un-retired goddess/cover girl Raylene and young porn Everyman James Deen. As they're arguing in front of Judge Ron about his whoring around and her laziness, the couple come to a mutual agreement to reconcile all over the desks right there in the courtroom. Without his bailiff there, Judge Ron can't throw them out so he adjourns the court and lets the happy couple get to it. Every guy in the room except the judge loiters in the background to watch, as do some of the women. Can you blame them? Raylene is as much a champion fucker as ever and James brings out the best in every woman he partners in a scene. He holds her hair back as she sucks him off and spanks her ass a little while bending her over the desk. Raylene talks dirty, whoops and hollers like it's the best sex she's had in ages. She's maturing into a cougariffic force of nature, even growls and makes fierce faces like a big cat on the hunt, in this case for the too-long-elusive orgasm. When James cums on her tits, she rubs his cock in her cleavage and they decide to give it four more years.
The other couple doesn't have such a happy ending, but at least they find lust at the courthouse. Monique Fuentes has come to get a divorce from her chronic cheater husband, Toni Ribas, who couldn't even keep it in his pants in the courthouse before their divorce. He's even trying to pick up court reporter Phoenix Marie as Monique describes how his repeated philandering wrecked their marriage. Judge Ron calls for a recess and retreats to his chamber. Monique prances after him in search of a win and in answer he pays a visit to her own chamber that ends in a cumshot all over her balloon tits, which are topped with permanently erect pencil eraser nipples. After Judge Ron rules in Monique's favor, Phoenix goes to console Toni and falls for his sob story. She's looking incredible in a skintight black satin skirt that zips up the back, and Toni takes his time unzipping it and savoring the gorgeous sight of her firm cheeks emerging like a present being unwrapped. Once the skirt and her sexy lacy panties come off we get a hot vaginal and anal fuck that ends with her squeezing the cream pie back out onto his junk before licking it clean, an image that's probably going to stay with you for a long time and bring you many happy erections.
Even if there's no happily ever after for most of these couples, "The Divorcee" should keep you happy for a while, with a couple of scenes even holding up to repeat viewings.